In the least shocking news heard in a while, Flavor Flav was arrested for wearing too many clocks and trying to remain famous way past his prime...just kidding.  Here's the real story:

"The misdemeanors are suspicion of driving under the influence, speeding, possessing less than an ounce of marijuana, having an open container of alcohol, false registration, and driving with a suspended license. The total bail for Flav — whose real name is William Jonathan Drayton Jr. — was $7,000."

They really could have just said, he was arrested and charged with being a pot head.  Driving under the influence?  Because he was high.  Alcohol?  Nothing goes better with weed, except for some Doritos.  False registration?  He was probably too high to fill out the forms correctly.  Suspended license?  Who has time for the DMV when you're busy getting blazed as much as he does.  He probably lost track of time...wait, he should never loose track of time.  Anyways, click the link above and, well, look at that mug shot.  I hear he's single, ladies.